Message from Rick

Hello,
I would like to thank all of you for your prayers and encouragement that you gave Kathy and me with her battle against this terrible disease. Kathy was a real fighter for the past 10 months she battled each and everyday...poked, stuck, scanned and every other medical treatment you can imagine and each day ending with a positive attitude and the love of life. But in the end she lost her battle. I loved this lady so much and I will miss her dearly and when she left she took a large part of me with her but I will always remember her as a great lady and a model for all of us to follow. She loved everyone she met and never past judgement on them and called everyone her friend. Her bright smile always greeted you and made you feel special. She had that loving touch that I am sure all of you experienced. Our family will miss her greatly but not as much as I will. She was my partner in life, mother of my children and I will love her forever. I hope all of you will say a prayer for her and remember her as the great lady she was.
Thanks again,
Rick

A Memorial Service will be held Saturday, January 21st at 10am.

Mission Hills Church, 400 Mission Hills Court, San Marcos, CA 92069. Reception to follow.

In lieu of flowers, please consider donations to either the San Diego Hospice (sdhospice.org) which was so valuable to our family during her final days. Or the American Cancer Society.
If you have any questions, you can contact Amanda Selby at amandaselby@roadrunner.com.

The eyes of our children

As my dad left our house last night to spend the night at his house alone for the very first time, our daughter, Bennett, said to him "You won't be alone Grammpa, you have Jesus!"
Our children have such an amazing perspective on death, one that I am trying to cling to.  They don't ask where their Gramma is because they know exactly WHERE she is.  She is in Heaven.
On Christmas morning when I came home with my Dad to our house, I had to tell our two kids that Gramma went to be with Jesus before they came downstairs to see what Santa brought them.  We were worried that it would put a damper on their Christmas day (like we were feeling!).  But when I told Brayden his face lit up and he said, "Gramma went to Heaven!  Now she can celebrate Jesus' birthday with Him."  There were no tears.  Just joy for her. For where she is now.
I know they are still young and in the days ahead they may miss seeing her and being with her.  But I wanted to share their reaction with you because I think children are so much closer to Heaven than we are...they get it! 
So in the moments when I feel the saddness well up inside me, I try to hold on to reaction.

Also, want to let you all know that we have not decided on where or when a service will be held yet.  First and foremost, we are working on taking her ashes to Hawaii which was her wishes. 
I will post more information on services in the coming weeks.

Happy New Year!

Heaven has a new angel

Mom went to be with the Lord around 3am.  I am here at the house with Dad (and Madison is here too, she was spending the night with them).  She went peacefully.   Our hearts ache, but we rejoice knowing that she is celebrating in heaven with no more pain and suffering.
Merry Christmas! 

Merry Christmas from my Mom. 
My mom recorded this book for my kids a few years ago, not knowing the significance it would have to us now.  As we sit with her this Christmas waiting for her to return home to Jesus, I wanted to share her voice with you one more time.
From my family...have a Blesssed Christmas!

Stable but declining

"Do you not know?  Have you not heard?  The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.  He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.  Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."  Isaiah 40:28-31

Many people have asked me over the past few days how I am doing.  My answer has been "Weary".  But the bible verse above has been on my heart today, reminding me that God can renew my strength while we wait on His perfect timing. 
But really, this is about Mom, not me!  She is the one that grows weary.  She has been through so much the past two years...battling thyroid cancer, then having a few heart scares, and now breast cancer this year.  And her breast cancer fight has been one big battle, but she always said to me, "I don't have it as bad as some other people with cancer".   
As she fights this final battle, I remind myself that she isn't growing weary, she is finding renewed strength to soar on wings like eagles...home to Jesus.

No change

For those of you who check the blog each night, my apology for not posting last night.  I took a much needed break and spent the evening with my kids.  Mom is fairly unchanged but did have several awake moments throughout the day yesterday.  She cannot speak clearly, but we can make a few mumbled words.  She opens her eyes but has a hard time keeping them open for too long.   Hopsice is doing a good job managing her comfort but she does seem to be experiencing much more pain now so we need to really stay on top of that.
This morning she is sleeping peacefully.  My dad is holding up amazingly well.  He has been with her 24/7 and getting very little sleep.  But we are trying to give him some breaks, make sure he is eating and just loving him and being there for him.  I know your comments on this blog have meant a lot to him, and mom too.

Dec 21...11:20pm

Another day has gone by and Mom is still with us.  Today she has been unresponsive.  We continue to have 24 hour hospice nurse care which is a huge help.  They monitor her comfort level and since they are have been through this they can give us great insight into what she is going through. 
Her breathing pattern seems a bit labored. But they ensure us she isn't in any pain.  That is what her wishes were...keep me comfortable.
The house is a little quieter tonight with Mike and Joan and Tony gone.  We told Mom she can stop being the hostess now and relax!  We know it is in God's hands.  We will continue to make her comfortable, we will continue to pray for a miracle, and we will continue to wait on His Plan.
Good Night.

Another day...

Not much to tell you, mom continues to fight.  She has her eyes shut most   of the time but seems to hear and understand us. She occasionally opens them. Not many words but managed to tell me she loved me when I left her tonight.  We continue to trust God's will and timing.  But I grow weary each day watching her fade away.

Day 6 of Hospice

Its Monday, December 19...Mom was asleep most of the day.  When she was awake she did recognize us and talked to us with very few words.  While she had her eyes closed I read to her all of the amazing posts from the blog today!  Thank you all for your kind and loving words to my mom.  Although many of your postings brought tears to my eyes and lumps in my throat, many stories made me laugh too.  Reading them aloud to her with family sitting nearby (even the hospice nurse at her bedside) is almost therapeutic for me.  It heals my soul telling my mom how very loved she is, how inspiring she is to others and how much joy she has brought to your lives.

Back in 2005 for Christmas my mom gave me a Mother's Legacy book.  It is a journal where she wrote pages and pages about her life memories.  On the last page the book asks, "What advice about life do you want others to remember?"  Here is her answer...
"I guess my advice would be, treat others with the same care and respect that you wish to be treated.  Another good one is its not whether we win or lose its how we play the game."

She always played with love abounding...and she will win her reward in heaven!  A crown of grace and glory.
I love you mom!

Day 5 of Hospice

It is very late in the evening Sunday.  Mom continues to get weaker and weaker.  We now have a hospice nurse with her 24/7.  The nurse will help manage mom's symptoms of discomfort and agitation.  Hopefully having someone there overnight will help my dad get a better nights sleep.
Thank you so very much to all of you who have posted such amazing comments on this blog.  I have read them to my mom.  They bring us all comfort in knowing how much you love her and how she has touched your lives.

Day 3 of Hospice

Its almost 10am on Saturday (Dec 17).  She continues to fight this battle.  She is about the same as yesterday, a bit weaker but talks to us when she isn't sleeping.
Mom had a pretty good day yesterday.  We met with the hospice team (nurse, social worker and chaplain).  It was very emotional, but a special time.  We were able to listen to mom talk about her diagnosis, memories, what she wants most now, how she feels physically and emotionally.  The chaplain also led us in a very special prayer, then mom prayed which was so poignant and meaningful to hear her talk to God and thank Him for her family and all He has done for her.
She is still eating small amounts of food and drinking too.  She has some discomfort from the bleeding behind her eyes so we are managing that with pain medication.  That seems to really help her rest and sleep. 
She is very aware and conscious. 
I spent this morning reading all of your comments to her!  I loved seeing her smile and cry tears of joy and sadness all at the same time.  If you haven't had a chance to read the comments, there is a consistent theme about my mom....that she has always been so kind and loving to everyone.  I told her that that is her legacy (along with so much more!).   This world needs more Kathys!  More kindess.  Less judgmentalness.  More unconditional love.  We can all learn from my mom.

Day 1 of Hospice

We met with the hospice nurse this morning.  Mom had decided late last night not to continue with her treatments which included her platelet infusion today.  Hospice ordered some equipment for the house including a hospital bed which we set up in the family room so mom can be downstairs and enjoy the commotion of our day!  She had been lying upstairs sleeping most of the days, and would often ask what time it was or who was in the house.  So we thought that bringing her downstairs might help her be part of more things.  We enjoyed the afternoon with Kacey, Madison and Chloe.  All three of them have been so supportive, loving and helpful this year.  Dad and I ran a few errands and then I fixed some dinner.  We all sat around and enjoyed time together laughing, telling stories and just talking.  It was wonderful and felt very special.  Mom smiled alot...and so did Dad.  Just having all of us there is such a comfort to my Dad.
Mom has been very sad about leaving all of us...and all of you!  Thank you all for understanding how hard this is for her and all of us.  But mostly for her.  She had said "no more visitors" and has not wanted to talk to anyone on the phone.  I know that is hard for many to understand, but please know that she loves you all and she is thinking about everyone. 
My brother, his wife and Emma will arrive tomorrow.  My mom has been asking to see Tony.  I will be back at their house for most of the day tomorrow and will  blog again to let you all know her progress.  Thank you to all who have called, texted and emailed.  If I haven't contacted you back, please understand how busy things are.  We are all doing our best during this difficult time.
Much love
Mandy

Hospice

Well as much as we had hoped this day would not come, mom's condition is declining rapidly.  Yesterday she went to have her platelets checked and they had dropped to a level of 5.  Drastically low, which means that she would have to go in for infusions every other day to keep her blood levels up as much as possible.
We met with her doctor and he let us know that even though the chemo she has been doing is working slightly on her brain fluid...it is not working at all on her bone marrow cancer.    There is nothing more medically they can do.  She is also showing signs of bleeding in various areas of her body, which are indicitive of the low platelets. 
All of this basically means that the cancer is spreading rapidly and her body cannot fight it.
We have called in hospice to help us assess her needs.  They come tomorrow morning.  She is still pain free!  And we spent most of today talking to her about this big decision.  She is a fighter!!   But she is tired. 
We will spend the next few days together as a family, enjoying time with her at home (unless they suggest that she go to a hospice facility).  I will blog again tomorrow to let you know what is happening.
But we have decided to stop treatments and let her relax and enjoy these last few moments with us...rather than spending 9 hour days in the infusion center. 
I know many of you will be praying for her.  Please know that she is happy, peaceful and she knows that Jesus is with her.  Like all of us, she is saddened that this disease has won the battle here on earth.  But she knows that the true Victory is in Heaven. 
God bless you all for your love and support!

Keeping the faith

Tuesdays therapy went well.  The nurses have been having a hard time finding veins so they put in a pick line on Wednesday which is in mom's left arm.  This will eliminate the need for sticking her each time they need to test her blood and do infusions.  She also saw an eye doctor this week to check her vision.  Vision was unchanged but he did find some slight bleeding in her retina, now she needs to see a specialist.
Yesterday was platelet day.  She also received red blood cells.  Her white cell count is low too, so she has to be very careful not to be around people with colds or infections.  We just pray that her bone marrow starts working properly to get her blood functioning.  On a positive note, she has gained another 3 pounds...and is up to 143!  This is amazing.  All good signs.
It was another long day in the infusion center but I went and sat with her while my dad spent the afternoon with our daughter, Bennett, making a little manger for her baby Jesus.  It may have been more tiring than sitting with mom!  But I thought it would be a nice change of pace.  And Bennett loves her manger.  It is so nice to have a handyman Grandpa!

Quick update

Happy December to all of you!  My mom is doing well.  Nothing new to report.  Today she is having her intrathecal chemo along with the Zometa infusion (that is the new drug they are giving her for her bones that she gets once a month).  We met with her neuro-oncologist last week and the recent measurements of her brain fluid show that the cancer is decreasing!  They still don't have measures on her bone marrow though, and won't take another sample of that until January.  She is still having trouble with her platelet levels and her hemoglobin.  We have asked the doctor to get more aggressive with the treatment to her bone marrow. 
She has stopped taking her blood pressure medications because her pressure has been relatively low.  She was very excited to get rid of some pills!   She is having some trouble staying asleep at night, so please pray for restful sleep (for both of them).  I think if she has good night sleeps then she will be more awake during the day. 
Dad has been taking her out of the house much more, to run errands.  They even went out to dinner the other night with their friends the Galbraiths who were in town from Lake Tahoe.  We are enjoying the Christmas season and we hope you all are too.
Much love to you all.

We hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving!  Mom and I (with lots of help from Dad!) were able to make some pumpkin pies on Tuesday.  It took a lot of mom's energy!!!  But she really wanted to do something for our Thanksgiving meal.  Our day yesterday was very special.  The meal was great...but love of family was the BEST! 
Mom and Dad spent most of the day over at our house today while their cleaning lady was at their house.  It wasn't easy for mom to be here.  But I think it was good for her.  And we loved having her here.  Dad got a chance to go run a few errands.  Mom got to see our kids running around being crazy with their friends.  I even took her on a walk around the block in her wheelchair.  Even our dog, Kodi, loved having here...he curled up at her feet and took a nap.  We are hoping she will make it a weekly visit!
Love to you all.

More good results

Mom went back today for chemo (which went smoothly) and had her blood platelet and hemoglobin checked.  Again, her levels were above the infusion numbers (platelets 23 and red blood 10, which was up from the other day!).  Praise the Lord!
She will go back again tomorrow for another check.  With this being a holiday week, the Infusion Center is very busy, so most likely they will infuse her with platelets as her level nears the 20 mark (she gets infusions when it falls below 20). 
But this is all great news because she has gone one whole week without an infusion...which means her body is making/keeping its own blood cells/platelets.  Which must mean the cancer is decreasing in the bone marrow.  But I am not a doctor!  So I will defer to the medical team for a specific answer, if they know one!
For now, we rejoice in this great week and thank our God for His grace and mercy!
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving, all of you!   I know I speak for my parents when I say, that we are very thankful for all of you.
Happy Thanksgiving!

Good Saturday CBC results

Just wanted to report in...mom went to have her platelet and hemoglobin (red blood cells) checked on Saturday to see if she needed an infusion.  Good news!  Her levels were up, high enough that she didn't need the infusion that day.  Her last infusion was Monday (11/14) so she has gone 5 days without needing the infusion.  She had been needing infusions about every 4 days...so we are hoping that this means that the chemo and/or medications she is taking are working. 
She is going back in tomorrow (Monday) for her regularly scheduled intrathecal chemo.  They will do another CBC blood screen to check her platelets and hemoglobin again tomorrow. 
She has been trying to do some of her physical therapy exercises even though she is still very fatigued and her muscles are tired.  She is also maintaining her body weight which is good news too.  She is still very tired.  But I think she is looking forward to Thanksgiving.  I talked her into making pumpkin pies with me!  So we are going to do that this week.  We will have Thanksgiving dinner at their house.  Dad is cooking the turkey.  Kacey, Madison, Chloe and I are bringing all the side dishes.  
I will post again after chemo tomorrow to let you know how it all goes.
Love to you all. 

Hanging in there!

Sorry I haven't posted for a while.  Mom is doing well.  She has had a few long days at the Infusion center where she has had to get platelets and red blood cells.  Her platelets continue to be low, and infusions are necessary about every 5 days.  Also her red blood cell level also drops, which effects her energy level and oxygen, so she gets transfusions almost weekly. 
She is still very tired and weak, but she is trying very hard to gain more strength by eating well and doing her physical therapy exercises.  She knows that the stronger she gets, the harder she can fight this disease.
I was with her this morning while Dad went to golf (we are trying to get him out once a week!) and she told me to tell you all that she feels very loved and blessed.  Her friend Dyanne who visited from Florida spent time with her reading the blog and the comments you posted. 
This Monday she will have her chemo treatment.  During the treatment they will "test" her brain fluid to determine if the cancer cells are reducing in quantity.  That measurement will take about a week.  She is also continuing with the chemo pills, which she know takes a higher dose every 3 days.  She is also taking two mineral supplements that will hopefully strengthen her bones and work on her energy level.
We are all looking forward to a blessed Thanksgiving.  We have so very much to be thankful for.  We hope you all spend time with your loved ones, enjoying the love and grace of our Lord Jesus.

Gained 3 pounds!!!

It may not sound like much but it is wonderful news.  Mom has gained some weight this week, which is probably due to all the wonderful company she has had, feeding her great food and encouragement and love.
She also got the results of the bone marrow biopsy which showed that the cancer in her bones and marrow is the of the same make up as in her central nervous system...this is good because all the chemo they are giving her can work on this cancer too.  No new meds are needed.  Also the CT scan results were normal, meaning there is no cancer in any of her pelvic organs!  The pressure she is feeling must be from the drainage of the shunt.  But she is still have that pressure and it is somewhat uncomfortable.  So pray that her body starts to absorb the fluid at a faster rate.
She had chemo treatment today.  It all went well.  Tomorrow she will have her platelets checked and she will begin a new infusion therapy drug that will help strengthen her bones and reduce the cancer there. 
She has a friend visiting this week from Florida (Diane) who was a friend from high school that has reconnected with her.  She is a cancer survivor and is a very supportive friend to my mom.  We are blessed to have her here. 
"The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms."  Deut 33:27

Bone Marrow biopsy and another CT scan

The doctors did a bone marrow biopsy on mom Monday -- this is to give us more details about the make up of the cancer in the bone marrow and what type of treatment options she has to slow down the growth of those cells.  It was painless (atleast she did great!).  After the treatment both of my parents came over to our house to enjoy Trick or Treating.  They do this every year, so it was wonderful that they continued the tradition this year too.  It was fun for them to see our kids all dressed up and so excited to go out into the neigborhood.
Then on Tuesday mom had another CT scan, this time of her pelvis area because she is experiencing some discomfort/pressure.  We should find out the results to both tests on Monday when she meets with her oncologist and has her next round of chemo.
Over the weekend she had a very nice visit with her sisters Pat and Karen and her sister in law Terry.  They all drove down from the Bay Area.  Today some of her long-time friends arrive, Carol and Michael Galbraith and Shirely Blythe.  They all drove down together from the Tahoe area.  They will be here for a couple days.
Much love to you all
Mandy

Another Infusion

Mom was very tired this week after her chemo treatment Monday.  She has been sleeping a lot and doing her best to eat as many calories as she can.  She had her platelet levels checked today, they were below the desired level of 20...so she had an infusion.  She will go back again Monday to have them rechecked (she is scheduled to have them checked 3 times a week now, MWF). 
She is also scheduled to have a bone marrow biopsy on Monday. This is a fairly painless procedure where they will draw a small sample of bone marrow from her hip so they can test it to determine if there are cancerous cells in the marrow.  They can also determine the type of cancer cells so they can select the best chemo treatments for to treat the bone marrow cancer.  The chemo she is currently receiving is focused on the cancer in her central nervous system fluid (brain fluid).
Her spirits remain strong and she seems to find great joy in having my dad treat her like a queen.  She is always telling him how much she loves him (and us!).  Her smile is beautiful!

Chemo day

Today was mom's 2nd dose of intrathecal chemotherapy-- where the chemo is given into the new port in her head and goes directly into her spinal fluid.  She did great, no pain, no problems.  Just a long day at the cancer center.  She did have to have a platelet infusion because her level dropped 20.
She also had her first dose of systemic chemo, which she takes as pills daily.  This chemo will go directly into her blood stream and affect her bone marrow and other blood/organs that may be affected.
Tony was in town over the weekend visiting, along with my mom's youngest brother Bill and his wife Cindy. 
Thank you for your continued prayers.  If I could be so bold...would you please add our son Brayden to your prayer list!  He has a slight case of pneumonia (high fever and bad cough).  As you can imagine, I have had my fill of doctor's offices.  We just got our daughter well from a long bought of fever and before that Brayden had strep...so we could use some wellness here!
Mom will go back to have her platelets checked on Wed and Fri.  She will continue with the systemic chemo everyday for a month.  And she will repeat the Itrathecal chemo in two weeks.
God bless you
Mandy

Holding steady!

Mom's platelet level today was just one point off yesterday, which is good news.  She did not have to have a platelet infusion (she will only be infused when it drops below 20-- today it was 24).  She will be checked again on Monday morning before her chemo treatment.  If it is below 20, she will get an infusion.  Either way, the chemo treatment is scheduled for 11am Monday.  This treatment does not affect her blood stream, so there is no risk with low platelets.  It is directed at her central nervous system fluid (brain fluid) and will be injected into the port which was placed into her head.
Mom continues to be tired, but I think we all are!  There is just so much going on.  Her eyes are bright and she looks happy and still has no pain!  Praise the Lord.

Low platelets

Sorry I haven't posted for a few days.  I know many of you have contacted me for an update.  Mom is still pain free!  The shunt seems to be working to keep the pressure down.  Unfortunately now her blood platelet level and hemoglobin levels are very low.  She had to have a transfusion yesterday.  She will go back to the doctor tomorrow morning, they will test the blood levels again.  Hopefully, the platelet level will hold.  They are not sure what is driving the reduction of platelets, they have taken her off some of her medications in hopes that that may be the cause.  She is scheduled for a chemo treatment Monday.
She has also being treated for slight pneumonia, which is from the surgery.  She is still very tired but has had a few great visits with friends and family.  She has started physical and occupational therapies which will hopefully help her maintain some strength (physically and mentally). 
My dad is taking amazing care of her!  He rarely leaves her side, but we are trying to get him back to the gym and he even go to go golfing this week.  He is so encouraging and loving toward her.  It is wonderful to see how much love they have for each other!
Thank you for the meals, flowers, cards and prayers!
Please pray for stable blood levels and physical strength to continue chemotherapy.

Home sweet home

Mom came home from the hospital yesterday afternoon.  She is happy to home but is obviously tired.  She will continue chemo this week and will also have to have soe physical and occupational therapy to improve her strength and memory.
Thank you for all the cards, visits, support and love.

Successful surgery

The surgery was a success. Mom is doing great.  The shunt has relieved the pressure and many of her symptoms are gone.  Now that she has a port for the chemo, they will tackle fighting the cancer spread.  That will continue next week.  She is expected to go home tomorrow.

Thank you all for your prayers.  God was present and merciful. 

Surgery day

Sorry I didnt post yesterday.  Mom had a tough day yesterday with a great deal of back pain and she slept most of the day.  But maybe thatv was Gods way of making her rest for today.
We are sitting in pre op getting ready for surgery.
Please pray for her to be strong and fight hard.
I will update you when it is over.

Good day

Just wanted to try and give you all daily updates.  We will see how faithful I can be with sitting down each night to do this!  Life has been very busy.
But I know how much you all want to be updated on my mom.  She had a good day today.  It seems as though she was a bit stronger, could walk better and felt overall much better than previous days.  The procedure she had yesterday must be working!
We spent most of the day at UCSD Thornton hospital going through pre-op appointments, getting her prepared for the surgical procedure for this Thursday.  She did so well...staying awake from 5:45am until almost 2:30pm.  With a busy day of appointments and talking with doctors and nurses...she was a trooper.
She enjoyed time this evening with her granddaughter Madison and her boyfriend Jarrod.  And of course, Mike and Joan are still here helping my parents with so much (cooking, cleaning, but mostly love and support). 
Most likely my mom will have the surgery Thursday to implant the shunt into her head to help relieve the build up of the brain fluid.  We are still praying about the surgery decision and talking it over as a family.
We are so blessed by all the emails, calls, text messages and love that we are getting from so very many family and friends.  I do my best to read all of your responses to my mom.  So please continue to post them when you feel like you have a message for her.
Love you all,
Mandy

Lumbar puncture & chemo success

Today mom had a lumbar puncture which drained some of the spinal fluid that has been creating pressure inside her head.  They also administered two chemotherapy agents which should act quickly on the cancer cells in her central nervous system.
This evening she showed signs of improvement-- having no headache pain and no nausea.  She also had much more stability while walking (she could barely walk at all this morning).  She sat and had dinner with my dad, Uncle Mike, Aunt Joan, my husband Bryan and myself in her bedroom sitting area.  We enjoyed a delicious dinner of scallops, rice and green beans lovingly prepared by Aunt Joan.  Mom ate better tonight than she has in weeks, even enjoyed dessert.  She walked without assistance and went to bed without pain medicine.
The doctors do feel it is necessary that a shunt be surgically placed into her head to continue to disperse the excess fluid from her brain into her belly area.  This will help to keep her symptoms away.  They also would like to implant a port into the other side of her head to administer the chemo agents directly to the brain area, rather than into her spinal column.  This surgical procedure could happen as early as this Thursday.  We will keep you posted.
In the meantime, thank you for all your prayers today.   God was listening!  And please continue to pray for her healing.  Every day is a new day.  And we feel blessed to have each one of them.

Mom is home from hospital

They let my mom come home from the hospital late last night.  There are no more tests to do, and they say she will be more comfortable at home.  We all agree!  Because of the cancer cells in her brain fluid, she is experiencing brain seizures that cause her to lose her words and make it hard for her to speak and remember things.  She is taking an anti-seizure medication that seems to be helping keep the seizures from happening.  She is very tired and she sleeps a great deal. 
Monday she will begin a new chemotherapy treatment that will attack the cancer in her central nervous system.  The drug will be administered through an injection into her spine.  The doctor says that we could see improvement after the first round of therapy.  She will have treatments every other week. 
We have been receiving so many calls, emails and words for support and prayers.  Thank you all for your love and encouragement.  Please continue to hold up my mom and dad in prayer.  Pray for God's healing power over my mom's body and for Him to give my dad strength and courage as he faces this journey.
Much love,
Mandy

Standing firm in the faith

My devotional this morning was 1 Corinthians 16:13, " Be on guard, Stand firm in the faith.  Be courageous. Be strong."    So that is what I will do.
The doctors have told us that there was no stroke all along.  That the cancer has spread into mom's central nervous system (brain fluid and bone marrow).  We are still waiting on more test results to confirm it is anywhere else in her organs.  But it wasn't the news we had hoped for.
A neurology oncologist will be meeting with us later today to give us some treatment options that will eleviate her symptoms and slow down the cancer growth.  We are hopeful that they will let her go home very soon. 
Please continue to pray. 

Back in the hospital

It's Mandy again.  Just a quick entry to update you all on my mom.  She was readmitted to the hospital (UCSD this time around) this afternoon with similar symptoms of speech loss (not finding words) and "black out" where she doesn't remember what happened for short periods of time.  Fortunately when this occurred my parents were at a UCSD coumadin clinic having my mom's weekly blood evaluation. 
The doctors ran a few tests this evening, none have showed any signs of new stroke.  They will continue with more testing tomorrow to try and determine the cause and nature of what is happening.  Hopefully they will have some answers and a treatment plan.
My mom is very tired but seems to be putting up with all the tests.  She is hopeful that she will get some answers now that she is back in the hospital.  My dad is amazing!  He remains so incredibly strong and courageous through all of this.  I can see how painful it is for him to watch her be so ill and frail, but I he is determined to get her on the road to recovery. 
As always, I will try to update the blog whenever I have more news for you. 
Love to you all,
Mandy

Hard to remain strong

Hello all my dear friends and family.

I have gotten so many very positive responses to my newest setback. You are all so suppportive to my plight. I need to admit God and to you all that I am discouraged and need extra prayers to not become more anxious than needed. My family is so good and helpful. They are propping me up daily. Pray for Rick that he is not discouraged by my attitude at times.

Dear God, make my life one of faith and trust in you no matter what setbacks come my way. Keep me focused on your power and on the positive outcome of the majority of the tests that were done in the hospital. Thank you God for the many wonderful doctors that you put on my case and the concern and care that the showed me. Thanks also for the great nursing staff that cared for me.

Love, Kathy

"Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven" Matthew 6:10

Slight Stroke

The doctors reviewed the test results and told us today that that my mom had a slight stroke.  So far her speech has returned and there seem to be no other side effects resulting from the stroke.  The doctors want to keep her in the hospital for another day or two to observe her.  Since she is already on a blood thinning drug, they aren't sure what other medications they will need to give her to reduce her risk of having another stroke.  So they will confer with her oncologist and get back to us.  They don't know what caused this stroke, but we are glad that we have some explanation of what happened to her.
Mom has also been compaining of some discomfort in her abdomen so they plan to do an ultrasound this afternoon. 
Thank you all for your continued prayers and concerns.
I will do my best to keep this blog updated as we know more.
Mandy

Hospitalized again

Hi friends and family,
Its Mandy.  Just wanted to give you an update on my mom.  Yesterday (Monday) she was admitted to the hospital because she had several episodes with problems of putting together words/sentences, confusion, trouble walking/climbing stairs.  The ER doctors ran several tests last night, thinking it may be an infection or mild stroke.  But after a multitude of tests, they are still unsure of what caused the episodes.  After a heavy dose of antibiotics, she is much, much better today,  speaking clearly and walking fine.  She is fully aware of where she is and what is happening to her.  She seems to be back to "normal".  But the doctors are still testing to determine the cause.  She will likely be in the hospital for another day or two while the observe her and as we get the test results.  She will miss her last scheduled radiation treatments, but hopefully not too much time will pass and she can return to them as soon as she is discharged so that she an finish them up as planned.
As soon as I know more I will update this blog.
If you have any questions you can call me at 760.613.1443 or email me at amandaselby@roadrunner.com.
Love to you all,
Mandy

Comming down to the wire

Hi,
Today was #7 of my last 8 radiation treatments. So Tomorrow is # 6 and so on. I will be complete on Thursday 22nd. That is the good news.... the bad news is that I have been having migraine like symptoms for the past 2 weeks. My radiation onclolgist Dr Rose had me have an MRI brain scan. The results were good. It showed no added concerns. Dr Rose prescribed Zoefran for the neausea. Seems to be helping. I see my primary physican Dr Tremain on Friday. She will prescribe the necessary migraine meds once she sees me. Guess they each have their own speciality and they try not to cross each others borders within reason.

Today was the coumadin clinic and once again my blood clotting numbers require decreasing my warfarin dosage once again. By the time they get the doseage right I will not have to take it anymore. I also had radiation and the best thing about that is the fact that my skin has been holding up well. The technicians are impressed because I am so fair skinned. I have been using a product called Lindi Skin which is an Aloe Vera patch that Joan Nolan gave me. So far it has worked miracles. I also use a lotion called Andra Sina emerald aloe relief lotion that the Radiologist recommended. I also us Aquaphor salve. It is a very heavy vasaline like salve. So ther you have it ...my recipe for taking care of radiation skin.

So even thought I am close to the wire I covet your prayers. Pray for Rick and I to remain strong through this last part of the treatment. I can hardly wait to have a clear calendar and be able to plan some fun things to do and be able to travel and see you all.

Love you all,
Kathy

"Taking him by the ritht hand, he helped him up, and and instantly the mans feet and ankles became strong." Acts 3:7

Thanks for the strength your prayers impart to me.

Taking lots of naps

Hi,
I just completed my 4th week of radiation. So only 2 1/2 weeks to go. I have been getting more fatigued with each treatment. I take a nap each day and am early to bed and get at least 10 hours of sleep each night of sleep. It is kind of like the suggestions we got when we became new moms. Sleep when the baby sleeps. Guess that is still good advice. Helps the body to regenerate.

Today started out with neusea and a headache. Don't know why the neusea is showing up this late in the game. I took anti-neausea med and some tylonol. I had a 9:30am appointment to check my blood clotting factor at the La Jolla coumidin clinic. Again we are adjusting the dose of the meds as my blood is thinner than they want it to be. On the way home we stoped at the Japanese market and picked up a few things and also some sushi for lunch.

Our housekeeper was at the house when we returned and so I went over to my friend Barbara's house and took a nap so I would not disturb Bertha or her disturb me. Barbara was in Julian so we did not disturb her either and she is such a good friend that she delights in helping me any way she can.

Hope you all have great plans to do some relaxing on this long weekend. We are missing yet another fun thing that the family has going this weekend. Our sister-in -law Terry has retired from the school district after 30 plus years and her daughters are throwing her a retirement party. Too bad we could not go to that monumentous party.

I will try to update my blog more faithfully for all my faithful friends who open the blog first thing each morning, and are disappointed not to have any news posted. So... Michael you can go and feed Calvin the cat now that you have read this update. I wouldn't want him to loose any weight while you wait for me to post. LOL

As always I am in God's awesome grip.
Kathy

"I will lay me down in peace, and sleep: for thou, Lord, only makest me dwell in saftey."
Psalm 4:8 KJV

The finish line is in sight !!

Hello All,

I just completed #15 of the 33 radiation treatments on Friday. So far it has gone by quickly with little or no side effects. I am a little tired but that comes with the treatment and is cumulative. I saw my chemo oncologist yesterday and I do not have to see him again until November.

We had some great company last Saturday. My brother Bob and his wife Sandy made a trip down to visit. They stayed at the Marriott in San Diego as they had points to use up. We had a great time catching up on family news and they got to visit with Mandy and her family as well. Emma (Tony's daughter) was still here so they got to see her as well. Although we have seen them at family functions we rarely get the chance to have that one on one conversations. It is nice to have that kind of time together.

We are having a hot spell here but will not complain as our friends and family who live on the east coast are bracing for Irene to come their way. Our prayers are with you all.

We are going to watch Brayden play in their playoff championship Basketball tournament at 11AM. If they win they play for first place at 12:30. One blessing is that it is at the indoor gym at the YMCA.

Hope you are all finding something fun to do this weekend with those you love.
Love Kathy

"However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me - the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace."
Acts 20:24

Looking at the bright side

Hello to all my friends who so faithfully read this blog.

I have just completed my first week of radiation treatments. So rather than look at the many more to come I choose to look at the ones that I can count off the total. Another bright side is that I injected my last shot of Lovenox this morning. Yahoo. So onward and upward with this treatment.

The brightest side of the week is the fact that Tony, Michelle and Emma came to visit yesterday. Tony and Michelle left this morning to continue their trip to Arizona and their retirement home. They came with a U-Haul filed with furniture and things for the new house.
Their plans are to move there in a few years, once Tony and Michelle are eligable to retire. In the mean time it gives them a vacation home to escape to.

They are quite the masterful decorators and do some really creative repurposing and refinishing. They got an old bow front dresser and painted it with vertical stripes of two shades of soft yellow. They also got a framed mirror and glued lots of shells to the frame. Their upstairs guest room is going to be decorated in a beach theme.

Even thought it was just an overnight trip it was jam packed with good food, lots of talk and shared love. Our bonus is that they left Emma here for a week vacation. She spent the night with Mandy and her family last night. School starts on Monday so we will have her all to ourselves during the week when Brayden and Bennett are in school.

Love you all,
Kathy

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer" Romans 12:12

How does it really work?

Hello,
I completed my first radiation treatment yesterday. It was a walk in the park in comparision to the chemo. It is amazing to me that that machine sends out rays that cannot be seen or felt yet it kills the cancer cells. How does it really work? I am so glad that God gave brilliant minds to those doctors and scientists that have perfected the machines and drugs that treat cancer.

The staff at the cancer center in Encinitas are very caring and kind. I am blessed that not only is it closer to home but the staff is as nice as those at Moores Caner Center at UCSD. I took a batch of chocolate Chip Cookies to endear myself to them to make sure they remember me. LOL

Rick is taking advantage of our overcast morning and is washing my car while the sun is not shining on it. He is the greatest!!


So my life scheduled by my standing 3:15 appointment for radiation each day. One down and 32 to go.

In His awesome grip,
Kathy

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Hebrews 11:1

PS. Our day trip to Big Bear on Friday was great. It is a 2 hour ride from home and is a mini Lake Tahoe with a beautiful 7 mile long lake and pine trees. The little village is quaint and has lots of cute shops and resturants. We took a side trip on the way home and drove to see Arrowhead Lake. it is a smaller more populated lake, but the same natural surroundings. Beauty is just a short drive from home.

Speaking of Tahoe, thanks Carol and Michael for the ever present reminder each treatment day of "Onward Christian Soldiers". It is comforting to know that you are near with your thoughts yet far away in miles. You are great friends!!!

Patience is a virture that I have not yet mastered

GMM

Good Morning All,

Our week started out with such a celebration on Sunday. We attended the baptism of our 8 year old great granddaughter Isabel. It was so very special as she is truely a spirit filled child and loves the Lord. She was beaming with the biggest smile on her face. So were all of us.

Another big day was Tuesday when I got tattoo'd. Nothing special like a big red heart with Mom in the middle, just 5 little dots to align the machine for radiation. I start the treatments next Monday at 1:30. I look forward to seeing light at the end of the tunnel with all this medical process.

I have been so excited for Wednesday to come when I got to have my blood clotting factor tested so I could be off the twice daily shots of Lovenox. I was even counting down the remaining shots. But guess I was counting my chickiens before they hatched. My blood count did not warrant taking me off the shots just yet and they also had to increase my dose of cumidin as my blood clotting factor had not gotten to the level they want. But the rainbow at the end of this story is that they adjusted my shots to only once a day. They say patience is a virtue and I guess it is something that I have to work on more.

On Thursday at bible study some of the gals sat me down and layed hands and prayed for my upcomming treatment and for my family too. They are such a great prayer warrior group and along with all of your prayers I know that God hears and answers each and every one of them.

Today is Friday and Rick and I are going to take a long ride up to Big Bear and look around. We have never been up there and it is said to be a nice ski resort and has a lake as well. Our granddaughter Kacey and her family have vacationed there and enjoyed it alot. Will let you know how our little day trip went.

Have a great weekend,
Love Kathy

"But we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently" Romans 8:23

Milestone Reached

Hello All,

Another milestone has been reached in my treatment. Today I had my port removed. The port was implanted under my skin so that they could access my vein to administer the chemo drugs and do lab work. Today was a great day as the port was removed which means that there is no more chemo scheduled in my future. Each one of the hospital staff from the front desk to the nurse and doctor in the procedure room gave me words of congradulations. It is truely a big day. I am so very thankful to know that this part of the treatment is done.

No other new news so, I will post again next week.
Love You All,
Kathy

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again; Rejoice!" Phillipians 4:4

A Rose is a Rose

GMM

Hello All,

I went to the radiation oncologist yesterday. She is really easy to talk to and I feel very confident that I am in good hands. Her name is Dr. Rose.... a good omen as my Mom's name is Rose. The office in Encinitas is about 12 miles from home so our trek each day will be more tolerable than going all the way to La Jolla and UCSD, another blessing.

Here is the plan of attack. On August 2nd I go in for a CT scan to plot out the field of radiation that Dr Rose will oversee. Then she will review the scan and make her specific plan for me. Then on Monday August 8th I start the actual radiation treatment. I will be going for treatment every day for 5 days a week for 6 1/2 weeks. The first 25 treatments will focus on both the breast and the lymph glands and the next 8 are called a "Boost" treatment. She explained that it is not a stronger dose of radiation just that they will focus mainly on the lymph system.

Our weather has been absolutely beautiful. We call it "Chamber of Commerce" weather. So if you are in the midst of that heat wave that we see on TV or are sitting under your umbrella waiting out the rainstorm come on down and see what I am talking about.

I am ready to finish up this race with perserverance and help from the Lord.

Love you all,
Kathy

"...Let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus the author and perfecter of our faith.." Hebrews 12: 1-2

Great News

I had my CT scan yesterday to check on a nodule in my left lung that showed up during a test on one of my ER visits. Today I got a call from Fiona who is Dr Schwab's right hand nurse. She said she had good news for me. The CT scan showed that the nodule had been "resolved" so we have do not have that worry any longer. The blood clot in my lung was "resolved" as well. She was elated so I knew right away that I had nothing to worry about. I told her it was answer to prayer. God is good. A little breathing room is a good thing to have right now.

Today I attended bible study this morning and this afternoon my friend Summer came over to visit and was here when I got my good news. We went out for a sorbet to celebrate. She was as happy as Rick and I were to hear the news.

Rick and I went out this evening to a nice Italian resturant for dinner to celebrate. Afterward we went over to our neighbor and my "Sister of the heart" Barbara's house and visited with her and her friend Jim who is recovering from hernia surgery. She teases that she is Nurse Ratchet. He is blessed to have her to take care of him.

I have an appointment with the radiology oncologist on Monday to set up a schedule to start the radiation part of my treatment. I am ready to take on this next step with God's provision for me. One of the squares on my scripture quilt says simply "Kathy, Relax, I have everything under control. Signed Jesus"

Just wanted to pass along this great news to you all and I will be making a post after my appointment on Monday.

As I always say I am in His Awesome Grip,
Kathy

"When you pass through the waters I will be with you; when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; and the flames will not set you ablaze." Isaiah 43:2

Thankful for time off

Hello,

Our week off has been a busy one. I thought I was done with medical appointments for a while but that was a figment of my imagination. Before I get into the specifics I want to express how grateful and happy I am that none of the appointments have been chemo. Yahoo!!! I have had an appointment with a coumadin class to teach me about coumadin as I will transition over from the Lovenox shots twice a day to a coumadin pill for the next three months. It will be nice not to have to give myself shots each day. Then in three months those pills will stop as well.

Then I had an appointment with the Genetic counselor. I gave them all the information I could gather about our family history of cancer episodes. They will be compiling the data and get back to me. Because Mandy has had a negative BRACCA test the counselor did not test me for that as I would have passed along the gene to her. So we rule out that connection. As I find out more I will fill you in. As of now it seems like the fact that I come from a very large family the odds are just greater that one of us would have an incident of cancer. So far the only recommendation is that the next generation of women in the family should take is to get a baseline mammogram at age 35 as opposed to 40. The next medical appointment was a counsult with the CT Radiology lab. Today I had the CT scan and will get results on Monday when I see my oncologist.

Rick and I have been busy JAMMIN" That is making jam. Well, really it has been mostly Rick who has done all the jam making. He made 20 half pints of plum jam and 7 half pints of cherry jam. He is getting really good at it and seems to enjoy it alot. And it tastes great and there is enough to share the wealth with friends and family. So besides raspberry jelly ala Bachan's recipe he has two new jams to add to his near famous Jammin list.

Some other fun things that I have done in the past two weeks is go to coffee with 8 of my bible study lady friends, shop at Macy's one day sale with Rick, and go to Brayden's first basketball game. We have also been out to breakfast a couple of times and out to lunch as well. My energy level is returning and I even cleaned out my bird bath on Saturday which has been sorely neglected. The birdies are happy to have a nice clean bath.

Monday I went with Mandy to watch Bennett and Isabel take their riding lessons. I have wanted to experience that since they started and they were happy to have me as an audience. After Rick came home from golf we went out to lunch at Gordon's on the green at Lake San Marcos. It is the resturant at the golf course. It was nice to it outside and enjoy the beautiful weather we are having and watch the golfers. Sort of like we do in our own back yard..ha-ha.

Yesterday we babysat for Mandy while she went to the airport to pick up Bryan's sister Angie and her three children who flew in from Raliegh NC. It was so nice to see them as it has been some time since we last saw them. Clayton and Cameron have grown into men when we were not looking. Reagan who is 8 is still recognizable and she is cute as a bugs ear.


So thanks for all the prayers,

Kathy

"But may the righteous be glad and rejoice before God; may they be happy and joyful." Psalm 68:3

Blessings abound

Hi all,
Friday we had an unexpected visit from our nephew Jim Murakami and his daughter Maddie. They came down to San Diego for the day to do a college tour at San Diego State. We felt very blessed that they took time out of their trip to have dinner with us at Bryan and Mandy's house. We have not seen either of them for 2 years and it was good to catch up on all the news from the bay area. We figured out that they had never met Bryan. Good to know your relatives. Jim and Maddi left on Saturday for home and a family reunion dinner party with the Yamamura family. Rick's brother Bob and his family are visiting from Oahu. Sure wish we could have been there.

We went to church this morning and out to breakfast at our local San Marcos Family Resturant then home to rest up. I am feeling the fatigue of the chemo once again. Guess it goes with the territory and I am glad when I have that part behind me.

Tonight we are going to go to Mandy's to have a birthday dinner to celebrate Bennett's 6th birthday. She wanted to go to Hawaii for her birthday but instead they went to Mission Bay and stayed overnight in a condo at Paradise Point. Lots of palm trees, pools and water. A second best alternative at such short notice.

Hope you all had a great weekend.
Love Kathy

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace." Numbers 6:24-25

This is the day that the Lord has made

I will rejoice and be glad in this day as I know that I have completed my chemo treatments.


Me and my brother Mike

Yesterday I finished the last of the 8 chemo treatments. I survived!!! My brother Mike and his wife Joan joined Rick and I for this last one. Joan went through this same battle with breast cancer just 2 years ago. They came all the way from Sonora for this great event. We loved having them and it really does make your heart sing to know that you have such great support.
I still have the radiation treatment to do but am feeling so very relieved having finished this part of the treatment. My energy level is growing stronger each day and having Mike and Joan here gave me a real boost in energy as well as boosting my spirits.

I will be undergoing another CT scan on the 27th before I start the radiation portion of the treatment. I have an appointment to do a genetic counseling and testing to gather information for our next generation so they will be forearmed by knowing their genetic family history. Maybe this will someday become a disease of the past like small pox.

Blessings,
Kathy

" The Lord your God is with you. He is mighty to save." Zephaniah 3:17

One more to go !!!

Sorry for the long delay in posting. I have had a really good two weeks between chemo treatments and did not want to hex it by posting the good news. My energy level is returning and I have been happy to have attended the All Star series that Brayden has been participating in. Unfortunately their quest for the trophy ended tonight as they lost to the Carlsbad team. Too bad but there is always a winner and a loser. It is one of lifes lessons. Believe in yourself and play your best no matter what. And above all have fun.

My chemo on Wednesday was uneventful and the realization that I only have one more to go has really hit home. Rick and I will have to find something else to do besides drive to LaJolla every other week.

Our weather has been really lovely and that makes us happy too.

Thanks for all your prayers, cards and well wishes.
Kathy

"The Joy of the Lord is your strength" Nehemiah 8:10

75% done with Chemo.

Hi all,

Since I last posted I have made yet another trip to the ER this past Monday with same symptoms as last week only this time the outcome was just dehydration and I did not have to spend the night.

My chemo went great yesterdayand I have been feeling really peppy the last three days. I hope that this is my new norm. So only two more chemo treatments to go. Another blessing is that my white blood cell count is high so I did not have to return to have the Neulasta shot today. One less trip down to La Jolla is a blessing. I am getting good at giving myself the shots twice a day for the anti coagulant. I only gave myself one huge bruise the second day. Glad I do not have to ask Rick for help as he cannot even look at a needle. So I guess i am letting his secret out of the bag... he is not perfect.

I have been using my down time to crochet chemo caps which I donate to the resource center at the Moores Cancer center. I have made 6 so far and my friend Barbara brought me a big bag of yarn to make more.

My bible study group got together under the guidance of Sandi Humphery and made me the most beautiful lap quilt. They personalized it by writing a scripture in each square. Sandi lovingly and skillfully sewed it together. So not only does it cover me and keep me warm but it covers me in God's word as a reminder that I am not alone in this journey. I have God and all the dear friends and family who support me with their time, talents and prayers.

As always I am in His Awesome Grip,
Kathy

"Be stong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

So much for my great off week

Hi All,
I was released from the hospital yesterday. The doc gave me some new med to control the blood clot issue. This is just another "lump in my oatmeal" issue that I refuse to let it get to me. I know that "The God who is in me is much more powerful than he who is in the world". I know that these setbacks and lumps are just satan's feeble attempt to discourage and wear me down. But guess what!!! They may sap me of my strength but never my spirit.

So onward and upward as I am feeling encouraged to know that next Wednesday is #2 of the last 4 chemo treatments. We are on the home stretch.

In His Awesome Grip,
Kathy

I am sharing a verse sent to me by my dear friend Sandi who is a cancer survivor herself.
"But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" 11 Corinthians 12:9 and it goes on saying "Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses. so that Christ's power my rest on me....for when I am weak, than I am strong."

Another hospital stay...

It is me, Mandy.  Well my mom was feeling great, had two great days out and about.  But this morning she was feeling very short of breath and her heart was racing.  She ended up at the ER, and after many tests they determined that she has a blood clot in her lung.  She is so glad that she didn't ignore her symptoms.  They have admitted her to the hospital and are giving her blood thinners.  They will also be doing more ultrasound testing to see if she has any more clots in her legs. 
I saw her tonight and her spirits are up!  She is hoping they will let her go home tomorrow.  Dad is by her side, as always.
I feel like I am always asking you to pray for both of them...and I know you do.  But please continue to lift them both up in prayer.  Pray that God will make this clot dissolve and that their will be no other issues for her to face.  Pray that her body stay strong for her chemo treatment next Wednesday and that she stay healthy during her hospitalization (we all know how germ infested hospitals can be!).  Pray that Dad leans on us to help him with his caretaking of Mom, that he trusts that God will heal her from this disease and that he gets busy planning some great vacation for when mom finishes all her treatments and is cancer free.
My love to all of you,
Mandy

This is the off week

Hi,
I am free this week of Poking, Proding, Chemo, and doctors. During this week my energy level is stronger and the side effects have diminished. It is Murphey's law that once you start to feel like your old self they have to do another round of chemo and you start all over again. But I am not complaining as My life is good.

Yesterday Mandy came over and picked me up and we met Bryan, Brayden, Bennett and granddog Kodi at an outdoor cafe and had a fruit smoothy. I have been in a self imposed quarantine as my immune system needs time to catch up. So being outside afforded us the pleasure of each others company without breathing each others germs. I got to hear all about Brayden's Memorial Day baseball tournament that they took first place. His hot bat helped the team to its wins. He was so excited to tell me all about it. He has also grown about 4 inches in the past week...or so it seems. He is very tall for his age. Bennett is in the stage of life that she is loosing her baby teeth and she looks adorable with her empty spaces.

Thanks to all who sent cards or called to remember my birthday. I felt the overflowing of love and care.

Hope you all had a nice long weekend of rest and relaxation.

In His Grip,
Kathy

"I thank my God every time I remember you." Phil 1:3

Moving onward with strength

Hello all,

Thanks for the prayers while I was in the hospital. My blood counts all got very low because I had a urinary tract infection that I did not know I had and my body could not fight it because of the very low white blood cell count. After 4 days of IV antibiotices I am feeling good. I saw the doctor today and got my blood work results that were AMAZINGLY good so we went on with the scheduled chemo treatment today. I started the second regiment of chemo with a drug called Taxol. It is a 4 session treatment every other week just like the last one. This chemo is not supposed to be as tough as the one I just fininshed. So I am believing the doctor and do not anticipate any more surprises.

Rick has been so very faithful spending every day all day sitting in an uncomfortable chair at the hospital Then he comes home and cooks, does laundry, changes beds and grocery shops. Am I the luckiest lady on earth or what??? His love knows no end and mine for him is just as strong.

His grip on me is strong,
Kathy

"but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

Home from Hospital

Mom was released from the hospital yesterday (Sunday).  Her white blood cell count dramatically improved, thanks to all your prayers!  And she has no more fever.  She is very happy to be back home, able to sleep in her own bed and eat great food. 
She most likely will skip her chemo treatment that is scheduled for this Wednesday.  But she needs to confirm that with her oncologist today. 
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers while she was hospitalized!

Update on Mom

Mom asked me to post for her...her is an update since her last treatment.
She is a fighter!  That is for sure.  But her body has been working so hard that she became very anemic and her white blood cell count has dropped very low.  She had to have a blood transfusion on Tuesday (May 17) which helped increase her energy level a bit.  She described it as "now I feel like I have bones in my body!".  But Wednesday she developed a fever which has landed her in the hospital.  Her white blood cell count dropped very low and they also believe she may be developing some sort of infection.  So they are giving her high dosed of antibiotics which seem to be helping. 
As soon as her fever goes down and her blood cell count goes up, they will let her go home!  Please pray that that will happen very soon.  Her bone marrow seems to be recovering quickly and the white blood cell count was much higher today.  But she has a way to go still.
Obviously this is not where she would like to be, but she is staying positive.  I will let you all know when they release her and she is home!
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."  Phil 4:6

Milestone!!!! Reached the half way point.

Yesterday was the last treatment of my first round of chemo. According to the doctor it is the most invasive toughest round to endure. The next one will be much easier according to him. And concidering that my side effects though troublesome have been minimal I am feeling blessed. Dr. Schwab says this is as good as it gets with chemo. So we know that God truely has had His hand of protection on me. My white blood counts have been high thanks to the Neulasta shots that I receive the day after each chemo treatment. My red cell count is low and I am more enemic after each chemo treatment, which was expected and may require a transfusion if they get too low. But the doctor is watching all those things carefully.


Rick is off golfing today as it is Thursday. I love that he is able to get out in the fresh air and do what he loves to do. Hope he has a good round that will be icing on the cake.

As always I am in His Mighty grip,
Love Kathy

"Thus far the Lord has helped us."
1 Samuel 7:12

This is no chemo week. Yahoo!!

Hi,
Thought I should post something for those faithful who check this site daily. This is my off week for chemo and I look forward to not seeing any doctors. I have had a new outbreak of the mouth sores and am following doctors orders. Guess is it something that comes with the chemo and the compromised immune system. Makes eating a chore. Thanks to a lot of you I have new recipes for yummy soups and even got a delivery of egg custard. Thanks Kay. I even shared a potato soup I made with a neighbor who is recovering from hip surgery.

I had a fun day yesterday as I rode along with Rick at Twin Oaks golf course. We decided that the fresh air and activity would be good for my health and for my soul. It was heavenly spending 4 hours outside just relaxing and driving the cart. He has been so great being stuck in the house with me more than I am sure is humanly possible. He is the greatest!!!

Hope you all have a very great weekend and Happy Mothers Day to all you Moms.

Love Kathy

"Cast your care on the Lord and He will sustain you, He will never let the righteous fall."
Psalm 55:22

Third Chemo down and feeling good

Had third chemo yesterday and all went great. God blessed me with a chemo nurse named Elizabeth who figured out the reason for a low sodium reading in my blood panel. I am drinking to much plain water. Who knew? They warn you not to get dehydrated while under chemo and being the overachiever I am I guess I took it to the next level. So now I am making sure I have gatorade and juices in a better proportion with the water too. And the doctor discovered that the sores in my mouth are herpes and not the dreaded mucousitis that we thought. I have never been happier to have herpes in my life. I have had 4 doses of meds for the herpes and the mouth is feeling so much better. God is good. I know that all these blessings are not coincidental and are because of all the prayers that are being lifted up for me and because God is in control.

As always I am in His Mighty Grip,
Kathy

Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you. I Thessalonians 5:18

Happy Easter

Spent this morning glued to the TV watching Easter Services and being filled with such gratitude for the miracle of the ressurection. The song "Because He lives I can face tomorrow" has a much more profound meaning to me.

Today we are having the family over for Easter dinner. The traditional ham, Gramma Rose's scalloped potatoes, asparagus and of course See's chocolate candy eggs and bunnys. Hope you are all filling this special day with good food shared with those you love and much gratitude.

Your prayers for healing are much appreciated and the most powerful gift you could give me. Please pray specifically for healing for sores in my mouth that are a side effect of the chemo and that hinder eating solid foods. I am being creative with my blender and if you have any good recipes for calorie laden creamy soups send them to my e-mail address. ricktani@cox.net

Love you,
Kathy

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen" Heb 11:1

Hair Today Gone Tomorrow

Hi all, Mandy came over today and made what could have been a very sad day a celebration. She arrived with a HARE (Easter Bunny) and makings for Mimosa's and of course Bryan's clippers. As much as I had prepared to lose my hair and celebrate the fact that the chemo is obviously doing its work it was such a blessing to have Mandy here to make it all fun. I'm not sure if Rick could have handled the shears on his wife. We sat in the back yard on this beautiful day and took lots of pictures. God has blessed me with a very nice shaped head. I also have a very nice looking wig. I am feeling great and am blessed each day when the Lord shows me His love through others. My dear friend Carol Galbraith and her husband Michael from Tahoe came over and spent a fun afternoon with us yesterday. Everyone should have a friend as dear as Carol. Feeling blessed, Kathy "They willl enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee from them." Isaiah 35: 10

Second Chemo Down

I had my second chemo yesterdsay and was blessed to have Dyanne (Nakagawa) Bardi sit with me through it. It is especially meaningful as she flew all the way from Florida to do it. She is a dear friend from high school who just reconnected with me last April. She is experiencing her own journey with cancer and chemo , which makes her act of love even more meaningful. God has blessed me with our renewed friendship. He knew that we would need each other at this time in our lives. I am feeling especially strong and well. I am blessed each day with friends and family who love and care for me and I am sure that is good for my soul. I want to share with you all that today is Mandy's 2 year anniversary of being cancer free....Praise God!! Love you all, Kathy "A friend loves at all times, but a brother is born for adversity." Proverbs 17:17

So far so good

I have had only minor symptoms from the chemo and thank God each morning for that. Our calendar is filled with nothing but medical appointments and as the oncology nurse said yesterday "We have taken over your life". Guess that is the most difficult of this whole process. Rick is such a great help. Not only does he attend all my medical appointments but his prowess in the kitchen is second to none. He even learned to do laundry and did not turn anything pink. Today Bryan Mandy and the kids return from their Spring break in Plam Springs. We can't wait to get our hugs from them when they return. They are such a source of joy that always brings a smile to my face. Bryaden is scheduled for a baseball game this evening if it does not rain. I am so blessed that each of you are in my life and I love you all, Kathy "I am still confident of this; I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord" Psalm 27: 13, 14

1st round of chemo went well

Just a quick post to let you all know that mom had her first round of chemo today.  Everything went well.  She is feeling fine!  They spent much of their day waiting around for doctors...isn't that always the case!  They did change the plan a bit and now she will have her next dose in two weeks.
I will post again in a few days to let you know how she is feeling.  But so far, so good!
"You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord God is the eternal Rock."  Isaiah 26:3

Fun in Arizona

We had a great long weekend in Peoria, Arizona!  We took in a Padre baseball game (against the Chicago Cubs) on Friday.     Then mom and dad (Kathy and Rick) went golfing the next day while we took in another Padre game.  We had great weather those two days.  The third day it rained so we headed to the Challenger Space Museum and then a movie.  Of course, Bryan and Brayden had to go their 3rd Padre game that night!
It was a very fun trip.
Yesterday mom had her port placement for her chemo therapy.  That all went great.  She is a bit sore today but she is doing fine.  Tony is here visiting this weekend so we are enjoying his company.
Next Wednesday mom will have her first round of chemo.  Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers that day!  Much love to all of you.

Correction! Wrong dates...

Well, in my last posting I said that mom would be having her chemo treatments weekly...and that isn't correct.  Just in case you're wondering, the beginning portion of her chemo treatment will begin March 30 but she only has it every three (3) weeks, not weekly.  That will go on for about 3 months.  Then after that she will have a different chemo medication that will be weekly for another 3 months.

Sorry for the confusion.  Just know that she is in great hands and she is preparing to begin a six month process.  This coming week she will have a few tests done so please keep her uplifted in prayer...and she will see her surgeon on Tuesday for her post-op appointment. 

Love to you all!
Mandy

Update March 10

Mom got the initial pathology back from her surgery and it was all good news...clean margins.  Which means that she can move along to the next phase of treatment.  She is recovering well from the surgery and has been getting out of the house with Dad.
Yesterday she had an appointment with her oncologist who guided her through what will be happening next.  She will begin chemotherapy at the end of March.  This process will be to rid her body of any additional cancer cells that could have escaped the tumor.  Chemo will be a treatment she has once a week for 6 months. 
We are hoping to be able to make a trip out to sunny, warm Arizona next weekend to relax and spend some time away.  As many of you know, my brother Tony recently bought a home there so we hope to all meet up there and spend some time together.  Please pray that doctor appointments will all line up so that we can make this trip, and that mom will be feeling well enough to travel.  It sure would be fun to get away and just all be together before she begins this next step in this journey.
We love you all and appreciate your continued prayers and support!

Quick update-- At home, recovering

It is Sunday morning (March 6) and I just wanted to let you all know that mom is doing great!  She got home from the hospital Friday early afternoon.  She has been resting and getting great care from my dad.  She isn't having much pain and has full range of motion with her arm!  She says she feels great. 
I just thought you might like to know how the first couple days were going.
Have a wonderful week!

Surgery went great!

Mom said that she woke up this morning (Thursday March 3) before the sun came up.  She went downstairs and sat on the couch where she always sits.  She snuggled up because it was dark and cold-- and she spent time praying-- getting herself ready for the day to come.  And while she sat in the cool darkness, she closed her eyes in prayer.  Suddenly she felt a warming sensation on her face and body, and she felt a light on her.  She opened her eyes to find the sunlight streaming in through her dining room window, reflecting off of a glass picture frame on a wall, directly on the place she sat on the couch.  She said it was like the Light of the World stepping out from the darkenss (like Chris Tomlin sings in Here I am to Worship).
God has been shining on her today...and has been with her consistently throughout this journey.  From the phone call she received yesterday giving her the good news of a surgery time for today to the calmness of her spirit as she arrived at the hospital.  And then the wonderful news Dad and I received when the surgeon came out to the waiting area to tell us that the surgery went exactly as planned and that mom did great. 
They removed the tumor and a portion of her lymphnodes under her right arm.  We should get the pathology report back from those samples in one week.
Mom is resting comfortably in the hospital.  Like Mary and Joseph, there were no "beds in the inn" when I left mom.  So she was still in the recovery area.  They were taking good care of her there and hoping to move her at some point tonight to a regular hospital room. 
She is scheduled to go home tomorrow at some point.  I assume it will be early afternoon.
She has a follow up appointment with her surgeon on the 15th.  And will also meet with her oncologist about the next phase of her treatment (chemo) in about two weeks also.
Until then, I will post again if there is more to report on.  Otherwise assume that she is resting comfortably at home and is being well taken care of by her loving husband. 
Thank you all for your prayers again.  So very powerful!

Surgery is tomorrow-- Thursday March 3

Sorry for the short notice, but we just found out that there was a cancellation in the surgeon's schedule and mom will be having her surgery tomorrow.
Mom met with her surgeon yesterday (Tuesday) to talk about treatment options now that she has decided not to particpate in the chemo-prior to surgery clinical trial.  The surgeon said that there is no difference in survival rates between mastectomy and lumpectomy treatments, so mom could decide on either.  But that she would recover faster if she had a lumpectomy...and faster recovery means that she would be on to the next course of treatment (chemotherapy) sooner.  That seems like the best option in getting rid of the all the cancer (tumor, lymphnodes and any other cancer cells that may have escaped the tumor).
So tomorrow, mom will check in to UCSD Thornton Hospital at 10:30am.  She is scheduled to have her lumpectomy around 1:30pm.  Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers throughout the day.  She will stay in the hospital overnight due to the lyphmnode dissection.  But I am sure she will be home by early afternoon Friday.
I will keep you all posted on the outcome of the surgery.  As always thank you for your love and support for mom!

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine..."
Ephesians 3:20

Mom is moving forward with surgery

Thank you all for prayers on the decision facing mom...she has opted to forego the clinical trial (chemo prior to surgery) and she has decided to have the tumor and some lymphnodes removed.  She will meet with her surgeon this Tuesday for a pre-op visit.  After that a surgery date will be set. 
 We will post again when we get on the surgery schedule and know more about the course of treatment that will follow surgery.
Mom wanted me to tell you....
 "how very blessed I am with all the outpouring of love, prayers and support.  And thank them, that I am overflowing with sincere offers to help, and with cards,  flowers, books,and CD's. God  has surely given me the best  group of friends and family that anyone could ask for.   Each of them bring me such a sense of being surrounded by love.   Share this verse with them.  " A friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity"  Proverbs 17:17"

I will post again next week after the appointment with the surgeon.

Feb. 23 update

Sorry it has taken me so long to update you all.
Mom is doing great.  She had a bone scan and an echo-cardiogram late last week.  We are still waiting for the results of those...along with one other test.  She will be meeting with her oncologist Friday (Feb 25) to get these results and to discuss her decision on treatment going forward.
She wanted me to thank you ALL for your continued prayer and support!  She feels you uplifting her every day. 
I will get back to you early next week with more.

In the meanwhile...
"Thus far has the Lord helped us."  1 Samuel 7:12

Met with Oncologist today

Well we finally met with mom's oncologist this afternoon.  It was an appointment that we were all anxious to have!  He was able to give us positive news, that the PET scan showed no additional signs of cancer.  We are still waiting for a bit more information on the biology of the tumor to determine if mom is a candidate for the clinical trial.  But he seems optimistic that she will have the trial as an option.  So he spent a great deal of time with us explaining the standard course of treatment for her vs. the clinical trial.
He seemed very confident that taking the tumor out now (opposed to after chemo) made very little difference in her overall results.  He gave us some peace of mind that there wasn't a huge rush to get treatment going "tomorrow", that this type of cancer takes time to grow and spread.  So mom has time to make her decision.


I know that I felt better leaving the appointment.  I have many of my questions answered and I feel like I have a much better understanding of this clinical trial and the benefits it will have for mom.  It seemed like mom and dad both did too. 


Now they have to spend some time talking and praying about what is the BEST thing for mom.  So please continue to lift them up in prayer, specifically asking God to guide them clearly to the path of treatment that is the best medicine for my mom.


Thank you all for loving my mom Kathy so much!

Tuesday Feb 15

The CT/Pet scan went as planned.  But results won't be in for a week or so. 
We see the oncologist tomorrow, and we are very anxious to hear what he has to say.  He should have the results of the MRI and biopsies from last week.  We expect that he will give mom a recommendation on different courses of treatments that she can take.  This should get the "ball rolling", so to speak.  And hopefully after this appointment she will be able to make a decision on what course of treatment she and Dad feel is the best.  Then most likely she can begin treatments next week.  Pray for that!